by Jeff Nelsen and Katy Webb
There’s been quite the reckoning lately with regard to what we know to be true. Do we believe what we see on media screens? Do we believe what we read? How can we be sure?
Some people remain sure. They have their systems, and what gets through is filtered by tests and checkpoints which remain in play. They continue to dance with those facts, figures, feelings, and fantasies. Oh wait, we ALL do that…we let in what we let in, and we keep what we keep. We just have varying degrees of being sure. Some of us need a greater sense of being sure, and we wait until the, “I’ll believe it when I see it” condition has been satisfied. Others watch and can take a chance with the, “I’ll see it when I believe it” approach, believing in something not yet proven by visible results.
Both approaches harvest much from life. All we want to shine a light on is how each guides your ability to walk onstage with belief in something that will help you play your best.
Belief. It’s what drives us to move in this direction or that. Do you believe you could do the work to win your upcoming audition? If you really do believe it, and you really want the job, you will find the ways to do the work that enables you to be a finalist, the winner, or not advancing but knowing a LOT of what it will take for next time! That’s how this works. Unfortunately, if you just believe you might have a shot, you’ll practice that way: you will do the work that satisfies your belief of what you should do to continue having a shot, but never win.
One of the first times I (Jeff) let my manic belief-system protection-walls go down, I was speaking with a faculty member at a summer festival. I’d played the Neilsen wind quintet, and the other horn students played the Strauss Serenade for Thirteen Winds. After the concert, the faculty member, amazing trombonist and human Dick Erb (Louisiana Philharmonic) walked up to me and said, “Nice job.” I said thanks, and he kept walking. I remember thinking, “That was nice…and now, yes, go talk to the real horn players who nailed the Strauss!” He talked to them too, but then he came back to me and said, “Can I talk to you for a minute?” I followed him to a corner of the room, and what followed was a moment like any other…just some nice things being said after a concert, right? He looked at me with his huge, Santa-white beard, and gruffly said, “Hey man, you really touched me tonight. I was moved by the way you went out there and told us how you think this goes. My wife’s an oboist, and I’ve heard that piece a hundred times, but you really said some new things. Way to go.”
I stood there stunned, and I thanked him deeply for his kind words. It could have ended there. “That was so nice…so anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, I gotta not miss notes….” But I kept that moment a moment for me. As I write about this now, I still remember that summer-of-1992 moment as a massive watershed moment.
I mattered. It might not have been just another swing at the piñata, hoping to get enough of it right. It might be true, what that sweet man just said to me. It might not be what I always think, that just because I thought of this or that, I’m sure everyone else thought of it too. I don’t matter. I’m just a fake, scared to death of being found out, regurgitating the notes and hoping to not screw it up too much.
But it might be true. I should ask him if he meant it. NOPE! You don’t need that. That’s you trying to be sure, choosing to need to be sure. Just believe. What would happen if you just shut up and believed what he said? Believe that your next note can matter. Keep doing the work so your next note can sound how you want, and the rest is up to the listener. You can’t make it matter, but you can make it beautiful in your opinion, simple but obvious phrasing in your opinion, colors and climaxes that reveal a story you think is compelling.
Keep doing that. Work and share as well as you can, and then you’ll find out what others think. If they’re listening and they agree with your concepts, they’ll like it too. Or maybe not…you can’t be sure. Either way, collect some feedback, do some more work, and share that new version. That’s about all we can do, right?
What you believe now and what you wait for proof to believe is all shaping who walks into the practice room and onstage. All we can say is that Jeff’s believing that one man’s 15 seconds of words, telling him he mattered, just that one time, sure has worked for him! Sure, there’s what you believe now. But you’re not stuck with that. Keep what works. But what you WILL believe, going forward, will determine the quality of your next performance and everything that goes with it.
What will you believe?
There are people cheering you on, believe it or not.
Jeff and Katy
(two of those cheering people)
If you want to learn more about making the most of your performance training, check out Jeff Nelsen and Dr. Katy Webb’s unique courses and online performance community at https://www.fearless-performance.com.
